ROOM 101

[plummy]

After watching the first episode of the new format BBC program - ROOM 101 - I thought maybe we could have a thread of our own. This is a place where you can vent your spleen and write down all the things that drive you mad/make your skin crawl/wish were banned from the face of the earth.

They can be silly/irrational/quirky/oddball - as long as it's some thing you have as a pet hate (or similar). Let's dispense with all the obvious (suffering/war/disease/poverty/child cruelty etc) - these are a given, and move to the little things that drive you insane. I suggest you have one post each and edit it as you think of more (I guarantee within a hour of posting you'll have seen/experienced something else you want adding to your list but there's no reason to have an extra post each time - just edit your list)

[plummy]

Footballers endlessly, perpetually spitting everywhere on the pitch
Grown men chewing gum with their mouths open
People driving with their front fog lights on - WHEN IT'S NOT FOGGY
Adverts for American cop TV series - (all American cop/detective series adverts consist of someone walking around with a gun sticking out in front of them)
Adverts for British action/drama series - wait a few seconds and bingo! some couple "getting jiggy" in a bedroom
Car insurance adverts
People driving in the middle lane of motorways and NEVER moving over
The inability of anyone involved in sport to finish a sentence without using the word "fantastic" to describe something, at best, quite good
ALL soap operas
Cutting food with your fork - that's what a knife is for

Edit 1:
People eating noisily in cinemas - scratch that, people eating AT ALL in cinemas
People using mobiles in cinemas/people talking in cinemas

Edit 2:
Reality TV series such as X-Factor/Something on Ice etc and the stupid pantomine judges having tiffs for ratings
Competitive cookery programs with "judges" deciding on what's good or bad based on one spoonful and "what it looks like"

Edit 3:
Boy bands and girl bands (one for Webberg)

Edit 4:
TV Sports "commentators" who endlessly ask questions (i.e speculating rather than reporting actual events) - "is this the time...?" could this be the one...?" "are we about to see...?" etc etc etc - and using the word "fantastic" every 5 seconds - again

[hewitt]

Phone calls from Double Glazing sales people who obviously dont live in our country.Yesterday was an Asian guy called JACK.

[webberg]

How long can the list be?

This is a dangerous time waster for me.

People who stand in the Tube ticket gates searching for their ticket which they must have had to get on the bloody thing!

People, who when asked to pay for a coffee etc, start searching for their money

Foorballers with a gravitionally challenged attitude

South West Trains

I'll be back...

EDIT 1

Football managers and players who don't know what an adverb is. It's not "he played fantastic", it's "he played fantastically well". Muppets.

Football managers who can't see their own teams' misdemeanours but complain loudly and whinge when the other team get exactly the same treatment.

Idiot IFA's (which is most of them) who are just greedy commisison monkeys

People who throw their still smoking cigs on the ground

Every tourist who haas ever been in Regent St

All TV reality shows which are really partially scripted pantomime written for the hard of understanding and performed by people who are so desperate for their 15 minutes of fame that they will surrender their dignity and all pretence of ability. As somebody famous once said, "It's better to remain quiet and appear a fool than to open your mouth and confirm the fact"


EDIT 2

Credit card companies who ask you to put your card number into the phone and the first question you get from a human bean is "what's your number" "I've just put that into your system" Sorry, that system doesn't come through to us. Then why bloody ask!

Train companies where "late"means more than 10 minutes late for a reason that does not include track problems, signal problems, train breakdowns late crew on incoming trains, or in fact any reason that can be invented

Mums on the school run who assume that delivering sweet little Billy gives them the right to ignore traffic rules and drive in the middle of the road at more than the limit.

My ex wife

EDIT 3

Idiot people in shops or on the phone who say "and is this for yourself" - no such word in that context!

Olives

[billwright]

People who punctuate their conversations with "like", "you know" and other useless verbal furniture.

BBC announcers use of the word "indeed" which seems to be offered at every opportunity when speaking to their reporter colleagues "at the scene".

The use of text language when writing in media other than mobile phones.

People texting in the theatre (normally the same ones who eat noisily all through a performance).

People on the phone or in a shop saying "Bear with me". Worse, people writing "Bare with me".

The use of phrases such as "Gobsmacked" "Gutted".

When a criminal thug meets his maker, the friends and relations who swear that he was such a lovely man who wouldn't hurt a fly.

Bill

[Paul Victory]

People, who when asked to pay for a coffee etc, start searching for their money

That's the first one that came to mind for me.

The unsolicited sales phone call comes a close second.

[Stan]

Text messages from idiot legal companies offering compensation for non existant accidents.
Unsolicited phone calls from idiot legal companies offering to get ppi payments back for non existant loans.
I agree with everything Bill said (I was going to just say "everything Bill said" but that could have been misinterpreted )
People who expect drivers in the middle lane to move over when they are busy overtaking people on the inside lane.

[andy walls]

Cold Calling
Dog owners that dont pick up their dogs mess
Packaging that cant be recycled
Birmingham City fans (only joking Wolfie )
Calling customer services and not getting a human on the other end of the phone until you have listened to numerous lists of options

[billwright]

Calling customer services and not getting a human on the other end of the phone until you have listened to numerous lists of options

Just a tip on this one which sometimes works. When you get one of those numbers don't press any buttons once you get through. Do nothing at all despite the many repeated requests. Eventually you will get a human operator. Something to do with visually impaired and hard of hearing folks. (

Bill

[Shang-Chi]

Hey David. Funny idea for a thread.

Unclean/smelly people in line at the store

People who doesn't understand the importance of logic.

People who throw cigarette residue or garbage everywhere.

Small people, with big dogs that they have no control over.

Guys who blow themselves up to appear stronger than they are.

Girls/women who have unrealistic clear ideas about how their future husband must be.

Motorists who do not keep distance in traffic.

Cyclists who are injured or killed because they absolutely had to stay in the blind spot and not behind when the truck turns right. How stupid can you get.

Above-residents who use shoes indoors on hardwood floors

I'll be back

[Wolfmiester]

Christmas lights on the ouside of houses/gardens.

Middle Lane hoggers (I could blow a fuse on that one).

[Shang-Chi]

Middle Lane hoggers (I could blow a fuse on that one).

Middle Lane hoggers Is that people who misuses the middle lane on the high-ways (I'm not sure of the word huggers and Lane is spelled with a capital )
Is huggers like pigs/swine

[webberg]

I call the drivers referred to CLOD's

being "centre lane owner drivers"

Used to bother me but as I probably drive less than 3000 miles a year now, I've mellowed.

I'm going to add though Prima Donna footballers as exemplified by, but not restricted to, Balotelli.

[Wolfmiester]

Middle Lane hoggers (I could blow a fuse on that one).

Middle Lane hoggers Is that people who misuses the middle lane on the high-ways (I'm not sure of the word huggers and Lane is spelled with a capital )
Is huggers like pigs/swine

Yes, sorry Mikkel. To "hog"is to hold on to and not let go or let anyone else use. Similar to a child not letting anyone else play with a toy, or someone on the gym rowing machine for too long and not letting anyone else on

[Thomas W-P]

Signs in hotels that say (paraphrase);

"We care about the environment, leave your towels hanging up if you do too"

They don't. They care about their cleaning bill. If they really cared, they would donate the saving to environmental charities at the end of the year.

And hotel shampoo with spherical lids tightened with the strength of ten men, women that are impossible to open once the shower starts.

I really don't miss my old job do I?

[plummy]

.....women that are impossible to open once the shower starts.

..am I reading that right?

[Paul Victory]

.....women that are impossible to open once the shower starts.

..am I reading that right?

So, that never happened to you!

[Daffy]

.....women that are impossible to open once the shower starts.

..am I reading that right?

No, Dave , you are not... Funny though!

(I think Thomas is being very p.c., and saying the bottles were tightened by either ten strong men OR ten strong women).

[Paul Victory]

No, Dave , you are not... Funny though!

(I think Thomas is being very p.c., and saying the bottles were tightened by either ten strong men OR ten strong women).

Jane, you should never let the truth get in the way of a good joke.

[Shang-Chi]

Hey David. Funny idea for a thread.

Unclean/smelly people in line at the store
People who doesn't understand the importance of logic.
People who throw cigarette residue or garbage everywhere.
Small people, with big dogs that they have no control over.
Guys who blow themselves up to appear stronger than they are.
Girls/women who have unrealistic clear ideas about how their future husband must be.
Motorists who do not keep distance in traffic.
Cyclists who are injured or killed because they absolutely had to stay in the blind spot and not behind when the truck turns right. How stupid can you get.
Above-residents who use shoes indoors on hardwood floors
I'll be back

Some more things that I hate:
People who walks in the middle of the road or bicycle path and doesn't makes attempt to move away when you approach in high speed.

Neighbors that at 7:00 PM starts some kind of noisy activity, like vacuuming, interactive video game or house repairs.

Neighbors that throws/drops cigarette residue from the balcony.

People who talks out loud on the cell phone in a public place, as if we were interested.

[Spikeola]

The Scrap man, who comes down my street 4 times a week.

picture this;

blaring air horn followed by, 'enn odd uuurrrnnnn' took me ages to understand his accent.

I actually don't mind the service he offers but when you hear him and get the scrap ready for him, he's bloody well disappeared down another road. Worst of all is that he comes by every sunday morning at 9am, on the dot!!

[webberg]

People who want the UK (and elsewhere) to "go green" without really understanding the implications or thinking through the consequences.

For example the "wind is good" lobby.

Wind power has it's place. On a district scale it makes sense that when the wind blows, power is taken and used immediately and locally. This is good business, good economics and good for the environment.

National scale wind is a nonsense. Power companies are paying wind generators to STOP PRODUCING as they have too much power in the grid. Guess who ends up paying people to do nothing = you and me.

Offshore wind is a massive political scam. Installed megawatt cost per HMG = £1.5m. Installed cost per the industry = £4m per MW. The payback period is around 30 years for a unit in which the pylon might manage 20 years, the generator perhaps 10 years and the gearbox perhaps 5 years if there is no big storm.

Wind has a place and it's small and local. It's not the answer on its own and the sooner the tree hugging community understand that the better.

[plummy]

People who eat food by placing a fork (with food on it) in their mouth and scraping it back out through their teeth.

Snoring!!!!

Pointless celebrities

People who suck air in through their mouths like a dodgy builder after everything they say

[webberg]

People who walk around or sit at a restaurant or train or other public place holding their mobile phone in front of them or conspicuously in their hand as though they will be called constantly and the caller cannto wait for them to find the bloody phone from a more discrete place.

Message to them

Nobody cares what phone you have. Nobody is important enough to have to answer a call within 0.4 seconds. Your life is more important tha 200 grams of plastic.

Get a life and put the phone away.

[Paul Victory]

People who walk around or sit at a restaurant or train or other public place holding their mobile phone in front of them or conspicuously in their hand as though they will be called constantly and the caller cannto wait for them to find the bloody phone from a more discrete place.

Message to them

Nobody cares what phone you have. Nobody is important enough to have to answer a call within 0.4 seconds. Your life is more important tha 200 grams of plastic.

Get a life and put the phone away.

Actually Graham, if I'm not turning off my mobile phone because I want to be incommunicado, I tend to keep it somewhere handy so that I won't have to spend ages footering around looking for it when it rings and finally managing to pick it up just as it goes through to voicemail.

Guess I better make sure I keep it turned off if we're ever on the same train or in the same restaurant.

Paul V