Deer stalking and spider slaying

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deerworrier

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Post by deerworrier »

i built a huge wall...did they call me the wallbuilder? no

only kidding, im an ecologist, i run my own small co. which sets up survey sites to monitor the populations and damage caused by various species of wildlife but mainly deer, the nasty part is if the damage is unsustainable i.e trying to regenerate oak or semi natural woods, then my work is presented as proof to the government powers that be to permit a large scale cull, so if you were a deer i would be worried at the sight of my old trooper parked on your turf :shock:

will email mr lemon and get the good old saltire flying.

just managed to update my nikon d70 firmware over the internet, took me 2 hours but i did it. one in the eye for the ludits:)
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Post by Thomas W-P »

:lol: I like it. Venision stew tonight!
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Post by webberg »

Dear Nice Mr Deerworrier,

I own a very nice deer rifle and have been known to use it occasionally.

To save you the trouble of reporting any infestation of the troublesome creatures to HMG, I am sure that I can find the time to reduce the problem for you.

Yours in anticipation.

I really love venison as well. I have an "arrangement" with the local butcher. I kill the pests, he butchers it and we share the meat.

Try venison and chocolate casserole - gorgeous.
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Post by deerworrier »

red roe or sika?its not that dificult to get authorisations up here all you need is someone with land and deer they dont want, he is trying to grow grass and the deer are eating grass so an unsustainable differance of opinion occurs and the deer lose by vito, 2 things, no shotguns and clean heart shots only. i am sure you will have all the scottish laws and regulations regarding the suitable callibre of rifle for each type of beast :wink: as layed down by the deer commission for scotland and are registered on their rifle database.

or if you really fancy a challenge try munkjack. little buggers, no season cos they breed all year round(lucky so and so's)
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Post by Thomas W-P »

I was charged by a munkjack once. 2 stone of pure evil vs my 18 plus stone. He was in my mum's (walled) garden eating her herbacous border. I was between him and the exit.

Thunder of hooves, yelp of surprise from me who hadn't seen him and he shot past me like a guided missile. :o
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Post by webberg »

My main experience in deer "management" has been as part of the New Forest annual cull. This is not an event that is regularly publicised but nonetheless happens.

To qualify for this you have to go to a range where the Forestry commission types will check the gun and put you through a marksman test. This is usually 5 rounds at each of 200, 500 and 800 metres. Need to score over 125 to qualify.

Once qualified you are given an area to work. Nobody else is allowed in that area. Many times I have stalked a target only to have it drift our of my area and then had to leave it alone.

Not done this for about 25 years. However bought a nice new (and legal) rifle last year and have already claimed a few trophies. Also provided us with our Christmas lunch last year.

Mainly Roe this end of the country but I have stalked Red in Scotland many years ago.

Might be doing some more next winter so I'll look you up. :P
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Post by jainser »

I hunted and tracked down a rather large Spider last night. Wife and kids were petrified (legs up off the floor on the sofa job).
I waded in with a size 11 CAT boot, went to go left (rather sweet dummy) sent the 8 legged little fiend to the right then WALLOP.
I shall now be known as 'Pete the Spider slayer' :roll:
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Post by Mike Channin »

Deer and now spider slaying. Nothing to do with meters, but VERY entertaining. What a wonderful bunch of people we have on here.

Oh and well done to the big green spider slayer for leaving me trailing in his wake on the meter board. He's now over the horizon and gone. Respect!
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Post by deerworrier »

webberg wrote:My main experience in deer "management" has been

Mainly Roe this end of the country but I have stalked Red in Scotland many years ago.

Might be doing some more next winter so I'll look you up. :P
if you ever get the chance of a bit of sika, take it. the meat is as tender as roe (if cooked nice and slow) with a good game flavour(not to strong as some red stags can be).

my relations from canada were out last november and one comented on the poor condition of the stags, i asked him how he would look if he did nothing but fight and f@@k for 6 weeks, fair point and well presented was the reply :lol:

do they still control the fallow populations down there? i was working in new galloway last year and caught a glimpse of a group on the edge of a clearing, nice beasts but a bit to soft for the highland winter conditions.

p.s if you venture this far i would be more than happy to show you some of the better areas, there are some grand days to be had if you know where to head.
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Post by jainser »

Took out another 8 legged monster last night.
Thinking I might pin the little buggar outside the back door as a kind of warning to all his little mates?

Pete 2 : Spiders 0
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Post by Thomas W-P »

Our garden is infested with massive spiders this year. I have never seen the like. Their body is about as big as a 5p piece with white markings.

One took a fancy to me and built a massive web across the path to my office/gym. It was bobbing right in my eyeline. I exterminated with prejudice using a cricket bat to show the dominance of my species.

Funnily enough my eldest daughter (6) just carries them around in her hands. She loves them. Not sure what they think.
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Post by jainser »

She loves spiders - is she mad !!!!!!!

We used to have a cat that loved eating them - never got that cause one minute he would be tucking into a nice tender piece of chicken then go and eat a bloody spider.
Do cats have taste buds or (more worringly) do spiders taste like chicken??
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Call THAT a spider! Pah!

Post by PSims »

Our cottage is 300 years old.

Our spiders wear studded jackets and have tattoos... :lol:

I'm not allowed to kill them as the better half doesn't approve.

So we have an electric thingy to suck them up - then I chuck them out in the rain.

But guess what - they come back the next day... :evil:
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Post by BigWaveDave »

must be the year for big spiders - we seem to have been taken over in the back garden so much so I came home last night to find the better half hoovering them up!

Told her I am not emptying the hoover this time
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Spidys

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Tell her they breed inside the hoover.... :lol:

You should get a Dyson....they are so crap it wouldn't suck them up!
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Zapp the little buggars

Post by jainser »

Last year I brought a Bug zapper from Play.com Works a treat on gnats, soone as they hit it (or indeed it hits them) ZAPP! there frazzled :twisted: And as it's in the stlye of a tennis racket I can practice my back-hand as well. Result.

Bit lively though, when I first got it couldn't resist seeing how strong it was. I really should have listened to the instructions when it said DON'T TOUCH. We're not talking 240v stuff here but it still bloody stung.

I'm not suggesting using this on the 8-legged little fiends, that would be cruel, a size 11 CAT boot is much more humane!

http://www.play.com/Gadgets/Gadgets/STT ... oduct.html
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Post by webberg »

Jainser, what happens in your house when real monster appears?

I'm thinking of perhaps a field mouse or an injured sparrow?

My kids love the bugs and things. They spend a lot of time catching them and throwing them into the garden. We even catch wasps and bees in a glass and release them into the wild again.

My wife though hates garden pests and any snail/slug/plant eating beastie is executed on the spot.

I don't do this and can't stand things like frogs, newts, anything that lives in a rock pool, crabs (unless dressed and served with a Sauvingnon) or worms.

Happily deal with any rabbit/rodent problems or management of larger mammals but reptiles really get to me.
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Post by jainser »

Field Mouse - 14lb sledgehammer
Injured Birds - Sniper rifle with a "lay-zor" sight

Real monsters - I'm kinda stuck with them, we've had 3 of the little terrors overs the years :D
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Post by webberg »

Jainser, I imagine your house is sprinkled with anti sparrow chain guns and vermin seeking missiles? 8)

Know what you mean about the monsters that stay with you. We have three at home at the moment and two away.

My 12 year old is a complete nightmare at the moment. Heaven knows what happens when teenager strikes. :roll:
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Post by jainser »

Was taking down our garden shed at the weekend and WOW there was some big arsed spiders under there.
I didn't realise garden spiders could get that big, what the hell have they been eating? mice????
And talking of mice made a right tart of myself infront of the missus. Was digging up a (very stubborn) root when this mouse shot out from 'somewhere'. Well in my natural big manly way I let out a "jesus, what was that" (which was in a slightly too higher tone!) whilst jumping back and tripping over :oops:
I've ordered myself a new handbag :wink:
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Post by Mike Channin »

Biggest European house spider I ever encountered was in someone's tractor shed while clearing out. It was 4.5 inches across, and had a body the size of my thumb. You can tell the _really_ big ones because you can hear 'em walking around.

I seem to remember that the record for a (native) spider in this country was 6 inches across (according to the Guiness Book). Imagine bumping into that!
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Post by Mike Channin »

Oh, and I keep an old badminton raquet handy for removing stray flies from the flat. Swish! Problem solved.
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